Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Tim Horton's Has Real Tableware

I don't want to get anybody in trouble here – so I'll keep things vague. Let's just say the following story took place at a Tim Horton's Donut Shop somewhere between Brooklyn and Brattleboro, Vermont, where I spent last weekend.

It's 8:00 PM and Mrs. Blognut and I are barreling down a major New England highway to the crackling croon of Will Oldham. Some particularly enticing signage appears flashing orange and purple - not surprising in the Dunkin-heavy North-East - but also a Tim Horton's. Two Donut possibilities in one exit!

Dining at Tim Horton's is a rare occasion for Blognut - reserved for my infrequent stints north of the border, where the chain was founded, or for journeys upstate to see my Buffalonian Grandma. So there is no question which mega-chain we'll be supporting tonight. A few minutes later we step into Tim Horton's.

This is when things get exciting. I greet the cashier-Donut-lady and order TH's new Chocolate Raspberry. It arrives on an actual plate adorned with Tim's logo – a touch of class foreign to most American Donut franchises who prefer shoving your Nuts into flimsy, white paper bags.

"Woah - a Tim Horton's plate," I say to the Donut-lady, "can I buy one?"

"No, unfortunately we don't sell plates, we're a Donut shop. But I tell you what," she says, "If it happens to go with you when you leave, I won't tell anybody."

So we sit down and I inhale the Donut. It's not one of Timmy's strongest selections. The chocolate cake dough is decent enough but the snake of bright red raspberry icing tastes like a melted cough drop – there's a definite medicinal bitterness to it.

Now comes the task of sneaking the plate into Mrs. Blognut's purse, which is a lot harder to do than it sounds. Every move draws an accusatory stare from this old lady in the corner. Seriously, at least five attempts thwarted by my grey-haired nemesis. Finally I just say "Screw it," and shove the plate in Mrs. B's bag. I throw a thankful nod to the cashier and power walk past the old lady and out to the car where it's on to Brattleboro.


Michael said...

Dude. . .this post was the best I've read all day! You rock!

Rev. Rick said...

I still have that beer glass from an unnamed pizza place in Richmond, VA. Admittedly, it's not as "fly" and a do-plate, but the story is the same.

Thanks to the kindest ladies in the world, together we have a plate off which to eat and a glass from which to drink.

We are ready for what the world "dishes" out to us.


Rev. Rick said...

forgive the typo.

theblognut said...

forgiven. slurp slurp.

beta said...

What a complete and total loser.

Jangles17 said...

wow, me and my buddies take Tim Horton's dishes on a regular basis...
we almost have a full set (4 of everything)
*including silver trays :P =)*

It's Worth Clicking Lmao

p.s. incase anyone cares and doesn't think I'm a complete loser.. we also have 2 or 3 napkin dispensers =)

See pricing said...

Interesting article. Actually, I was not at all impressed by the author comments. We should be positive and move further...Just my 2 cents