Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Tim Horton's Has Real Tableware

I don't want to get anybody in trouble here – so I'll keep things vague. Let's just say the following story took place at a Tim Horton's Donut Shop somewhere between Brooklyn and Brattleboro, Vermont, where I spent last weekend.

It's 8:00 PM and Mrs. Blognut and I are barreling down a major New England highway to the crackling croon of Will Oldham. Some particularly enticing signage appears flashing orange and purple - not surprising in the Dunkin-heavy North-East - but also a Tim Horton's. Two Donut possibilities in one exit!

Dining at Tim Horton's is a rare occasion for Blognut - reserved for my infrequent stints north of the border, where the chain was founded, or for journeys upstate to see my Buffalonian Grandma. So there is no question which mega-chain we'll be supporting tonight. A few minutes later we step into Tim Horton's.

This is when things get exciting. I greet the cashier-Donut-lady and order TH's new Chocolate Raspberry. It arrives on an actual plate adorned with Tim's logo – a touch of class foreign to most American Donut franchises who prefer shoving your Nuts into flimsy, white paper bags.

"Woah - a Tim Horton's plate," I say to the Donut-lady, "can I buy one?"

"No, unfortunately we don't sell plates, we're a Donut shop. But I tell you what," she says, "If it happens to go with you when you leave, I won't tell anybody."


So we sit down and I inhale the Donut. It's not one of Timmy's strongest selections. The chocolate cake dough is decent enough but the snake of bright red raspberry icing tastes like a melted cough drop – there's a definite medicinal bitterness to it.

Now comes the task of sneaking the plate into Mrs. Blognut's purse, which is a lot harder to do than it sounds. Every move draws an accusatory stare from this old lady in the corner. Seriously, at least five attempts thwarted by my grey-haired nemesis. Finally I just say "Screw it," and shove the plate in Mrs. B's bag. I throw a thankful nod to the cashier and power walk past the old lady and out to the car where it's on to Brattleboro.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dude. . .this post was the best I've read all day! You rock!

Radio Ahab said...

I still have that beer glass from an unnamed pizza place in Richmond, VA. Admittedly, it's not as "fly" and a do-plate, but the story is the same.

Thanks to the kindest ladies in the world, together we have a plate off which to eat and a glass from which to drink.

We are ready for what the world "dishes" out to us.

yrs.

Radio Ahab said...

forgive the typo.

bstetka said...

forgiven. slurp slurp.

beta said...

What a complete and total loser.

Jangles17 said...

wow, me and my buddies take Tim Horton's dishes on a regular basis...
we almost have a full set (4 of everything)
*including silver trays :P =)*
Pic:
http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=viewImage&friendID=107030522&albumID=54843&imageID=24852394

It's Worth Clicking Lmao

p.s. incase anyone cares and doesn't think I'm a complete loser.. we also have 2 or 3 napkin dispensers =)

See pricing said...

Interesting article. Actually, I was not at all impressed by the author comments. We should be positive and move further...Just my 2 cents

Unknown said...

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